11 Ways Narcissists Try and Manipulate You

There are narcissists all around you. But that’s not the problem. The problem arises when narcissists try to manipulate you for their own motives. If you think there’s a narcissist in your life who’s intent upon using you for their own benefit, it’s necessary to recognize their ways and tricks.

The one trait every narcissist has is that of selfishness. A narcissist will always be selfish. When dealing with a narcissist, it is always best to keep your distance in order to protect yourself from their devious ways.

11 ways narcissists try to manipulate you

1. Triangulation

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A narcissist always believes he/she is right. In their heads, they cannot ever be wrong. For this reason, whenever they get into an argument with you, they tend to bring a third person into the conversation. The third end of this triangular conversation will be brought in as support for them. They bring third party as a witness who has already been convinced of his/her point of view.

2. Devaluing

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Initially, the narcissist praises your qualities. After short period, he/she will criticize all of those traits. This is their tactic to make you believe that you are worth nothing and you need to do more if you want to stay in their good books. It makes you question your value and is a major attack at your self-esteem.

3. Aggression

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Researchers working on the personality traits most commonly exhibited by narcissists found that aggression was one quality every narcissist had in common. Be it verbal or physical.
It easy to identify physical aggression but psychological aggression is an entirely different ball game. Here are some traits of a narcissistic abuser

Intimidation

Threatening

Degrading language

Withholding physical or emotional support

Excessive control over you

Trying to control your behavior

Pushing you into doing things, you don’t want to

4. SHAMING

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A narcissist will always try to make you feel insecure and even ashamed about your achievements. Be it education, social class or appearance. Only to feel better themselves and feed their shallow ego.

5. PLAYING VICTIM

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Another of the narcissist’s favorite tactic is playing the victim card. They would resort to such tactics in order to gather some sympathy votes from you. It’s always best to stand your ground when dealing with a narcissist.

6. INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR

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Narcissists tend to behave in ways, which are not very socially acceptable. They would indulge in vulgar acts and resort to obscene language in public. Embarrassing you in public is one of the narcissist’s favorite ploy. They feed their already inflated ego when you justify their acts in front of others. Hence, they need to act inappropriately.

7. MONOPOLIZING CONVERSATION

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Everything in a conversation must be about a narcissist. The rare times when it’s not, they’re still busy thinking about themselves and probably not paying attention to anything you’re saying. They will cut you short, but absolutely hate it if you cut them off.

8. PROJECTING

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Whenever you accuse a narcissist, they would hold you responsible for their actions. You were the one who forced them into doing what they did. This happens because in their heads, they are flawless.

9. BRAINWASHING

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A narcissist has the ability to make you do things for them, which you would never do otherwise. They use intricate ploys in order to make you obey their wishes.

10. GASLIGHTING

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This is an insidious tool used by sociopaths and psychopaths. A narcissist will always have fabricated proof for any accusation you may have against them. They will always make you think you’re wrong and insist that you’re just delusional. They do it with such conviction that for a second you start guessing you own sanity.

11. VERBAL AGGRESSION

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Another of the narcissist’s favorite tool is obscene language and yelling. They use this to make you feel insignificant and afraid. It’s essential to stand your ground when they’re trying to bully you.

As a final word of advice, never try to change a narcissist. They are too full of themselves and entirely convicted of them being better than you are. They have already mastered the tools of manipulation and their inherently selfish nature makes you another one of their targets. All they are aiming for are some strange ways to fulfill their twisted pleasures. You need to be on your guard whenever you see these behaviors. Better yet, run the opposite way as soon as you see a few of these traits combined. You’re responsible for keeping your sanity intact.