Losing her virginity and having sex for the first time is a rite of passage that every girl goes through when she is ready. Whether you have had sex from an early age or you waited till you were in college or even after you were married, there are myths surrounding first-time sex. Here is everything you need to know about losing your virginity and keeping it as pain free as possible.
7. Talk to an adult
When you feel like you are ready to take this big step make sure there is someone around you trust whom you can talk to. It can be a counselor at school, a parent, an experienced friend, an older sibling or a doctor. They will give you all the information you need before going in and will have access to protection as well.
Even if you don’t talk to them beforehand, make sure there is someone you can discuss things with or call in case of an emergency.
6. Make sure you are ready
Never have sex because you feel like you have to or because everyone else is doing. The right time for you is when you want it. If your boyfriend keeps bringing it up or your friends egg you on tell them to stop with and set a clear boundary.
If you are not ready you will not enjoy sex at all. Similarly, your sexual preference is your choice. Feel free to the pick a partner you want to be with instead of what people would think or say.
5. Discuss it with your partner
If you are having doubts or second thoughts, discuss them with your boyfriend or partner. If you have any questions and they are experienced, ask them whatever comes to your mind. Remember that you have to think of yourself first before anyone else.
Even if you take the pill ask them to use a condom if that makes you more comfortable. Tell them what you are comfortable doing and what is completely off the table. Set a clear limit for both yourselves before committing.
4. Learn about the hymen
Hymen is a thin membrane of skin which partially covers the vaginal opening. As a girl grows older, the hymen may undergo wear and tear due to sports, menstrual blood or any other routine activity. The most common myth is that the pain experienced during sex for the first time is due to the breakage of hymen. That is not true.
Most of the people experience pain because of little or no lubrication. Here are some things you should definitely know about the hymen.
3. The infamous bleeding
Apart from pain, one of the most terrifying aspects of losing your virginity is bleeding when it happens. While light spotting of blood may occur the first time you have sex for some girls it doesn’t happen at all. Keep in mind that any bleeding you may experience during first-time sex will nowhere near be as close as menstrual bleeding.
Bleeding occurs during penetrative sex when the hymen breaks and it is completely normal.
[Related: Is Bleeding After Sex Normal?]
2. Know about the clitoris
Women rarely orgasm from sex via penetration. For most women orgasm results from clitoral stimulation. Oral sex as well as clitoral stimulation can help relax the muscles before penetration. Similarly having an orgasm before penetration also helps loosen up the vaginal muscles and will effectively reduce pain.
1. Leave stress behind
When it is your first time, make sure that you don’t bring any stress to the bed with you. Turn off your phone and stop thinking about anything else but the task at hand. Only plan to have sex when you are sure you and your partner will be alone and there is nothing to rush you two. When it is your first time, do not hurry sex. Take your time, go slow and steady, relax and enjoy.